Taking Responsibility in a Codependent Relationship

You know the worst thing about living alone? When you misplace something, you have no one to blame but yourself. I was looking for my headphones the other day. I was frustrated that I couldn’t find a single pair and more frustrated I had no one to blame but me! That got me thinking about…

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The Crucial Role of Self-Care During the Stressful Holiday Season

The holiday season, with its twinkling lights, festive decorations, and joyful gatherings, often paints a picture of warmth and merriment. However, beneath the surface of this seemingly idyllic scene lies a reality that many experience—the stress and chaos that accompany the holidays. Amidst the hustle and bustle of shopping, planning, and socializing, it becomes imperative…

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Are You Helping or Enabling?

You are a caring and loving person. You have a deep-rooted desire to help and support your loved ones. However, paradoxically, sometimes helping can lead to unintended consequences that ultimately cause harm to the very people you intend to help. Then help becomes enabling. The Hazeldon foundation defines enabling as, “doing for a loved one…

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Talking to Your Child About War

Talking to your child about sensitive and complex topics like the conflicts in the Middle East and the Ukraine can be challenging, but you can approach these discussions with care and empathy. Here are some tips to help you have a productive conversation: Talking To Your Child So They Can Understand You do not need…

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Boundary Setting – How Do I Say No and Mean It?

Saying “no” can sometimes be challenging and evoke feelings of guilt or discomfort. However, setting boundaries and learning to say “no” when necessary is essential for your well-being and personal growth and to have healthy relationships. In her book, Dare to Lead, Brene Brown lists boundary setting as one of the key elements for building…

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Are You Caught in a Drama Triangle?

When we continue to enable dysfunctional behavior, we fall prey to the Drama Triangle. Developed by Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at UC, San Francisco Stephen Karman, the Drama Triangle consists of three roles, Victim, Rescuer, and Persecutor. While you might see yourself and your loved ones as a specific role, in truth, each person…

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Meet Bruno, Therapy Dog

I have always believed in the healing power of animals. There is something about communicating with another species that is grounding, healing, and special. I grew up with German Shepherds who were always protective of me. They went right along with all manner of girl-play I foisted on them – playing dress up, carrying dolls…

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From Fear to Freedom – How Counseling Can Help You Thrive

As a psychotherapist with over 25 years counseling experience, I’ve developed some habits, for better a worse, as a counselor. One of the better habits is ending the first session early to leave more time for wrapping up and preparing for the next session I usually start by saying something like, “We need to close…

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Stop Repeating the Same Mistakes of Enabling Bad Behavior

Have you ever become frustrated because you find yourself in the same (or similar) predicament over and over with a loved one who will not change? How many times do you realize, often too late, that as careful as you thought you were being, you made choices that led you down the same old path…

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